emma, this one is for you...

so, the last night mom is at the hospital, i am leaving when i am stalked and attacked and repeatedly dive-bombed by none other than one evil june bug. i *hate* june bugs. i would rather sit in a vat of scorpions and play with a komodo dragon before being touched by a june bug.

as i'm walking across the parking lot, i hear the evil yet familiar buzz wizz by my ear. then again. then i feel it land. in my hair. after spastically thrashing about and shaking my head, i run like hell and jump into the car. cue in horror flick scene with chick heavy breathing in car and looking all around while locking the doors and getting the hell out of there.

as i start home on my merry way on the 401, i hear it again. IN MY CAR. the goddamn thing attached itself to me while i jumped into my car and WAITED until i was on the highway to start torturing me again. it starts buzzing around the backseat and i am terrified. i know it sounds ridiculous, but i seriously have a death fear of june bugs.

so i am opening windows and using cds to shoosh the offender out of the window and weaving all through traffic damn near killing myself over some stupid evil little insect that when you squish it, it leaks a greeny yellow puss everywhere. what a disgusting little creature.

i tear home, freaking the whole time, and run into the house. what do i get to kill the damn thing? jonathan. the great defender of tami and emma in times of june bug invasion.

(for everyone else, when emma and i were living in whitby, every summer during "the invasion," jonathan would save the day by rolling up a huge wad of newspaper and smashing the hell out of them. usually, we would hear "bug. smash smash smash. dead." while we hid in the basement.)

so jonathan came out, flicked the thing on the pavement, and crushed it into oblivion. god i hate those damn things so much.

on other notes, the hospital decided that giving everyone rotting vegetables wasn't enough so the floor got expired milk with dinner that night. imagine the fun that has been. but mom is home now and getting better every single day. she is even doing her physio without being pushed, so i am pleased.

HAPPY CANADA DAY! while i would much rather be in ottawa drinking a box of beer on a patio somewhere and enjoying all of the outdoor concerts, i am in da shwa. but alas, it is for a good cause. so instead, i am wearing underwear that says "100% canadian" and since i left my awesome new canada hat at home, that's about that.

emma and oliver arrive tomorrow and i can't wait to meet him! yea!